Feeling like a virgin

• 06-04-2009 8:06 AM

  Adero3057365 Joined on 05-14-2009 Posts 5

  Feeling like a virgin Reply Contact I just had my 3 child. He is 4 months old on the 12th. I had a vaginal delivery and he was 10 pds. (need I say more?). I had so many stitches I can't count and I developed an infection. I had 2 follow up appointments and everything is back on track. My problem is I am still not comfortable with having sex with my husband. He is way over due for making love with me. With this pregnancy I didn't want to have sex either so we haven't connect in almost a year (embarrasing to say). My husband has been very understanding and patient with me but I fear he is at his wits end with waiting on me to be secure again. The problem isn't that I don't want to have sex, I'm very much so afraid of it. I'm afraid it will hurt and that things just aren't right down below. At the end of the month we have a romantic weekend planned but I don't want to wait until then. Please give me some advice. Hopefully someone else out there has gone through the same or similiar situation and has overcome.

• 06-04-2009 12:19 PM

  In reply to

  Charlotte1833998 Joined on 05-29-2009 Posts 3

  Re: Feeling like a virgin Reply Contact Hi there! I know EXACTLY how you are feeling. My 2nd baby will be 4 months on the 12th. My husband and I have not had sex since last year November. I had severe kidney infections that put me into labour and the doctor advised us not to have sex. Now I don't feel like it although I know we have to sooner or later. My husband has also been very understanding, but is making hints almost everyday in that direction. I also don't know what to do, thinking it will hurt, although I had a caesar, and not even a vaginal birth. And stressing about it is not helping. Maybe we should work on a change of mind set altogether? Take it slow - rushing it is certainly not going to work. I want to be positive for your sake, but don't know what to say. Trying to fit in sex with 3 kids is certainly a challenge. Shall we look at the fun side of that???? What are you doing about contraception?

• 06-04-2009 12:41 PM

  In reply to

  Adero3057365 Joined on 05-14-2009 Posts 5

  Re: Feeling like a virgin Reply Contact the 12th my little man will be 4 months also. February 12th at about 12:58am he came into this world. How ironic is that. It is great to know I'm not in this alone. :-) My hubby got a vasectomy. It took me having another baby to persuade him to do so. I told him that I have to birth the children, go through the blues and lose weight (as if that happens naturally), breast feed and wake up at night for feedings I think you can handle a simple vasectomy. A tiny incision right under the penis, no pain as long as you follow the doctors orders and they are back in business. Women on the other hand taking pills and such will gain weight, lose hair and God only knows what else. If you know your family is complete see if you can persuade your husband to have a vasectomy. We will be using condoms for a few months while his sperm empties. When exaclty was your little born, what his or hers name and how much at birth? How exciting we have twins. :-) take care I leave work now. I'll respond tomorrow morning.

• 06-04-2009 10:50 PM

  In reply to

  Charlotte1833998 Joined on 05-29-2009 Posts 3

  Re: Feeling like a virgin Reply Contact I had a little girl - and boy I waited years for her. She was born that night at 18:44, weighed only 2,89kg (6,35lbs), but was 4 weeks early. My first one was a boy in 2004 - he weighed 9lbs. I thought about sterilising but could not get myself to do it. I would not mind another one, despite the times we are living in. But I am really really enjoying my little girl. At the moment (not that we need it - ha ha), I am not on any contraception - even previously, I never took anything. Her name is Courtney Robyn Reynolds, she was early because of the kidney infection (again), it put me into labour early. Doctor tried to stop the contractrions - but none the less - she was on her way. I did not complain - could not wait to meet her. How does you son sleep at nite and in the day? What is his name? And who take care of him when you go to work? What work do you do? Now I am off to work, fortunately my office is at home, but I have to go out to site from time to time. Today I have to go to Pretoria, which is about 45 minutes drive north from where I live. Take care, chat soon..

• 06-05-2009 4:18 AM

  In reply to

  Adero3057365 Joined on 05-14-2009 Posts 5

  Re: Feeling like a virgin Reply Contact Fortunately for me my husband is 24 years my senior. I work for the Centers for Disease Control as a Program Analyst and he stays home with our son and 3 year old daughter. They will both be attending school come this August though. My sons name is Zion Alexander Prescott. He sleeps at night as long as he is next to me. I breast feed him and during the day he misses me, so when I come home him and I bond throughout the night and into the morning. My husband would prefer he slept in his own bed. I guess that would help with our sistuation. :-) Are you breast feeding and does Courtney Robyn sleep at night? Pretoria, I send co-workers there from time to time. What is it like? It has been hot, hot here going into the summer season. Consistently 90 degree temperature.

• 06-30-2009 1:30 PM

  In reply to

  ~AmyJ~ Joined on 06-03-2008 OK-Addison 1-26-09 Posts 1,854	Re: Feeling like a virgin Reply Contact I waited til my baby was almost 8 weeks before we had sex and I was still a little sore but DH just went really slow and it was fine. Dont be scared it will be ok and you can stop if it hurts.

• 07-01-2009 6:06 AM

  In reply to

  Adero3057365 Joined on 05-14-2009 Posts 5	Re: Feeling like a virgin Reply Contact Thank you for this message. It was a challenge for sure and we have since had great success. He popped my cherry lol! :-)