Can't leave the house

• 06-30-2009 7:47 AM

  cmday Joined on 09-17-2008 NC Posts 344

  Can't leave the house Reply Contact Sorry, but I'm posting another vent. I've posted before about how fussy Kelsey has been (?colic).  Well, she's 8 weeks old now. As long as we stay at home, she's become more manageable. One thing that's helped is discovering the magic combination of swaddling her and putting her in the swing with white noise, which helps her take naps. I realized that she was just tired much of the time and couldn't fall asleep. This has helped a great deal. The problem is that she cries and cries in the car and wherever we go. She no longer likes to be in the sling, so I can't take her to a store. She hates the stroller too.  So basically I have stopped taking her anywhere. I can deal with it because she's not crying as much but I'm just disappointed that I can't take her anywhere. Has anyone else had this problem? I guess it's just something she has to grow out of.

• 06-30-2009 8:31 AM

  In reply to

  teacheroftwos Joined on 02-19-2009 Posts 278

  Re: Can't leave the house Reply Contact I have not personally dealt with this problem, but my friend has. Her little one (2mons) cries in the car and crys most of the time. She uses a Moby Wrap to carry him in and that seems to help. In my opinion, you should continue your regular routines. Don't let baby run your life. Baby has to get use to going out and the only way to do that is to practice. Try going shorter distances first and then extending the trip. Just my opinion, I hope you don't take it wrong. This will pass!

• 06-30-2009 9:43 AM

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  lifeismagick Joined on 07-22-2008 Ontario Posts 1,260

  Re: Can't leave the house Reply Contact  I have not personally experienced this first hand but I can sympathize.  My little sister was a colicy baby and all she did for the first three months of her life was scream.  I was only six so I could not tell you what my mom tried to help but I do remember her growing out of it.  No help I know.  But I know that sometimes Catherine will have an inconsolible crying fit and carrying her around in the Moby Wrap does calm her right down.  I wish I could be more help but I do agree with pp you should try to get her used to going out.  Sometimes just a walk around the block is good for your sanity.  I hope she grows out of it soon for you.

• 06-30-2009 10:03 AM

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  Keeger Joined on 05-06-2008 BC Canada Posts 1,016

  Re: Can't leave the house Reply Contact Sounds like you have a high needs baby. The Dr. Sears books have good info on on how to deal with a high needs baby. Kiersten hates the car too, sometimes I just have to listen to her scream the whole trip. It makes me a bit nervous because we're going away in two weeks and I can handle a 4-5 hour drive with her screaming. Have you tried a different type of sling/carrier? They all position the baby differently, so maybe she'd like a different position.

• 06-30-2009 11:55 AM

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  rmsandoval7 Joined on 06-19-2008 Phoenix, AZ Posts 464

  Re: Can't leave the house Reply Contact Sounds exactly like my older son. He would cry the whole time we were out. It ended up that he had reflux and that's why he was always miserable, he cried a lot at home too. But unfortunately we still had to go out, so he just had to deal.He grew out of it, but it was a stressful time and I definitely don't ever want to go through that again. I'm sorry, I can't really give you any ideas on what to do about it, but just remember that you can put her down in the crib and leave the room for a few minutes. It's not being a bad mom, in fact doing so can help you be more calm and relaxed for your baby. I had to do that a few times with my older son and just the few minutes away helped. I even would take a 5 minutes shower sometimes while he was in his crib to give me a few minutes of peace. I knew he was okay even if not happy, and it gave me a few to cool down. Don't worry though, she'll grow out of it!

• 06-30-2009 6:26 PM

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  Ctink8189 Joined on 09-03-2008 La Marque, TX Posts 1,062

  Re: Can't leave the house Reply Contact My DD was like that, except it was the opposite. She would cry and scream at home but when we went places the car and vibrations of the stroller calmed her down. At home i'd lay her on a blanket on the floor and vacuum. That always calmed her down, and my floors were always very clean LOL. I know that doesn't help you with the going out thing =( Maybe you could find a toy or something that vibrates and keep that in her car seat or attached to the side of her car seat. The bassinet I have came with one that attaches from the crib, and I am always detaching it and doing that for Cameron. Just a suggestion.

• 07-01-2009 8:43 PM

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  EggNogMama Joined on 11-22-2008 Posts 99

  Re: Can't leave the house Reply Contact Have you tried all the positions you can do in the sling? I never could figure out how to work our first one so this time I got a Moby. After watching videos online I decided it was the one for us. It's been awesome. She has some positions she likes more than others though. And what about going outside? This one doesn't seem to have a fussy time yet but DD #1 did and the only things that helped were either going outside and walking her around in your arms (works for this one too even to just distract for a few minutes), or there was a stained glass door and she loved staring at it. I'm thinking they're quite the pricey items so if you don't already have one you could do one of those melt the plastic kids craft ones to hang on the door. What about white noise (a cd?) in the car? That doesn't help much while you're out and about but at least you can get somewhere and then you can nurse her if that's still going on for you. I feel like "feed her" is my cure-all but it works really well and nursing is so comforting for them anyhow. I hope she starts that growing out of it part soon for you though.

• 07-02-2009 6:31 AM

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  Kristenamber Joined on 11-28-2001 PA Posts 518

  Re: Can't leave the house Reply Contact I have a similar baby, lol.  He is fussy and cranky whenever we go out and he also hates his carseat.  He screams in the stores, and the only thing he is okay with is if I'm holding him NOT in a sling or carrier, on my shoulder, and bouncing him.  And he's STILL fussing a bit. Things will improve in time.  My second born was the same as Walker, and he magically changed around 4 months old.  Hang in there, hon!

• 07-02-2009 10:16 AM

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  starnikki57 Joined on 09-22-2008 Brooklyn, NY Posts 63

  Re: Can't leave the house Reply Contact I have the absolute same baby but let me tell you what works for us.  Ultimately Kali (my lil cutie pie) is very picky as to what she likes and doesnt like and like you i though I was gonna be home bound too but we have managed to reach compromises. 1st I SWEAR by the moby wrap Kali NEVER liked the baby sling not even as a fresh from the oven newborn so i went to mobywrap.com and looked at the instructions on how to wrap the fabric then I went to the fabric store and bought 6 1/2 yrds of cotton jersey and made one for myself (i got the measurements from another site). You just cut the fabric so its 22" wide by 6 1/2 yards long  and get the wrapping instructions off the moby wrap website it is soooo much cheaper than buying the wrap. Kali will go ANYWHERE with me in that thing and is sleep most of the time while in it. But I wanted to get her used to the stroller because I fear with it becoming so hot she and I both may be miserable as the summer progresses. So like most newborn strollers she sits in her carseat in the stroller until she's big enough to sit in the stroller seat alone and like Kelsey Kali screams bloody murder so this is what I've done. We went to babies r us and got this  body insert for the carseat called a "snuzzler" and its made by a company called "kidepodemous" and you put it in the carseat so she's nice and snuggled from head to toe. I noticed that Kali hates the infant head rest that comes with the carseat b/c she can't turn her head the way she like. The snuzzler comes with a head rest too but its much more open and she seems to like it alot.  How the snuzzler works is its padded up by the arms and sholders so she feels secure and I also have learned that she LOVES for me to ride over bumpy terrain she just drifts off to sleep. We've been doing the stroller training for now 2 weeks and it is STILL very much a work in progress. I would suggest taking very, very short trips like to the end of the block and back home, I know its a pain believe me, but thats how we started.  I'd sit her in the stroller and start pushing if she started crying I'd stop pick her up and comfort her til she calmed down then put her back in. We'd do this constantly until suddenly her crys changed from blood curdling to a bit whiny to finally none at all!  Some other tips I would suggest are: 1) Keep the sun out her eyes (we use a sun hat and the carseat visor) 2) Make sure baby sees you at ALL times 3) Sing or talk constantly peeps look at me like I'm a fool because I carry on so bad but guess what it keeps her quiet! 4) have the moby wrap already tied around you while pushing the stroller so if worst come to worst you can just put her inside and walk home 5) Be patient :) it is absolutly something that takes time, my lil munchkin DOES NOT give in easily but we just go it a little at a time  Hope some of these suggestions help, sorry its so long, lol good luck and keep us posted!

• 07-02-2009 12:42 PM

  In reply to

  rmsandoval7 Joined on 06-19-2008 Phoenix, AZ Posts 464

  Re: Can't leave the house Reply Contact starnikki57: 1st I SWEAR by the moby wrap Kali NEVER liked the baby sling not even as a fresh from the oven newborn so i went to mobywrap.com and looked at the instructions on how to wrap the fabric then I went to the fabric store and bought 6 1/2 yrds of cotton jersey and made one for myself (i got the measurements from another site). You just cut the fabric so its 22" wide by 6 1/2 yards long  and get the wrapping instructions off the moby wrap website it is soooo much cheaper than buying the wrap. I'll have to try this, I want a moby wrap so bad but I just can't see spending the $40 for a piece of fabric. Do you know about how much a yard the cotton jersey tends to be? And did you just leave it cut or did you sew a seam or anything? Thanks for the suggestion with that, the Moby wraps are really great!

• 07-02-2009 1:42 PM

  In reply to

  cmday Joined on 09-17-2008 NC Posts 344

  Re: Can't leave the house Reply Contact Thanks everybody for the replies and suggestions. I also have a SleepyWrap, which I guess is like the Moby wrap. I used to use it around the house but it got so hot and after a while she seemed to start sliding down, and my back and shoulders hurt for a while after wearing it. The sling I got is made out of a lot cooler fabric and is much less cumbersome to deal with putting on. For the first few weeks I wore it, she loved it. I took the plunge and went to the mall today. I left after she had a 2 hr nap and ate. She didn't start crying in the car for about 5 minutes or so, then she let out this high-pitched blood curdling scream like someone was pinching her and cried the rest of the way. I had brought the stroller, but decided just to use the sling instead. She got quiet after I put her in it. We had been in the mall about 5 minutes before she started crying again. She cried a few minutes then fell asleep, then cried off and on the rest of the time. She was okay the rest of the way home, just occasional fussing. I really do think she is getting better. After we got home she calmed down really quickly. I laid her on my bed to watch the ceiling fan and she started cooing at me. It was the softest, sweetest little sound ever. I teared up, and it made everything seem so much better!  I know that one day I'll be able to take her anywhere with me, and then one day farther down the road she'll be grown up and I won't have a little one at home, so I'm really trying not to get discouraged and enjoy what she's doing now!

• 07-04-2009 4:16 AM

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  starnikki57 Joined on 09-22-2008 Brooklyn, NY Posts 63	Re: Can't leave the house Reply Contact I live in expensive NYC so the cotton jersey was still a lil expensive  but with that said after buying the 61/2 yards my total was $27 and as far as the ends I just leave it the jersey wont unravel. Lastly I keep the full 6 1/2 yards, wrap it and then tie it off like a nice tassle off the side  of my hip :). Plz let me know how it works for you!!!