Joymarie, I'm so confused reading your post. I'm not on PW much anymore so maybe there's stuff in another post that I've missed, so if so I'm sorry (I don't have the time or patience to wait for PW to decide to work for me, these forums are always so slow to load for me!). I don't understand why your doctors would say you 'have' to schedule a cesarean at one hospital, but will attend you as a VBAC at another. . . especially for them to say it wouldn't be safe for you to VBAC at one hospital, but it supposedly would be safe to INDUCE you at another hospital. Inducing &/or augmentation increases the risks of uterine rupture, infection, distress in mom & baby, etc. . .
I'm also not following your statement about not having a cesarean again unless the dr or anesthiologist say it's necessary. I don't know of many docs that would openly admit to recommending a cesarean for completely unnecessary reasons; they can always fudge some reason to make it sound 'necessary.' Most women here on this board or on the cesarean board are here b/c we were told that a cesarean was necessary when it really wasn't. One-half to two-thirds of cesareans are unnecessary, so it's a very real possibility.
Why would a cesarean at 41 weeks be necessary? Yes, I understand that the risk of complications goes up post-dates, but you're not OVERdue until after 42 weeks. Yes, complications do start to rise at 42 weeks, but if I'm remembering correctly they don't rise notably until after 42 COMPLETED weeks, which would mean reaching 43 weeks gestation, right? What is making them say that you'd 'have' to have a repeat cesarean at 41 weeks anywas, specific to YOU and YOUR BABY and YOUR PREGNANCY? They are making *general* recommendations based on averages & liability & blah blah blah. . . but what recommendations are they making specifically for YOU in YOUR case?
I don't understand when a care provider says that their hands are tied. Either they support you & want to help you acheive a safe birth of your choosing, or they don't. If they're saying their hands are tied at one hospital, to me that says that they are essentially saying that your wishes & you & your baby's health are not their priorities. . . & I'm sorry, but you DON'T want anyone around you during birth who's first & foremost priority is not to be there what you hired them for & do what's evidence-based to help you & your baby have a normal, safe birth.
I don't want you to have to get nasty after the birth if it doesn't go as planned or you aren't supported in the way you need. By then, it's already too late & can't be undone. My second cesarean was incredibly traumatic &, 3 1/2 years later, even after a successful hba2c & being *plenty* 'nasty' with the OB, hospital, dept. of health, etc etc, I'm still dealing with the trauma from the unnecessary repeat cesarean. It can't be undone.
I'm not trying to be a downer, I'm sorry, I'm just cutting to the chase because there really isn't much time to pretty it up. It sounds a lot like a setup to me, I'm sorry. No matter what you decide to do, I hope the decisions are *yours* & not influenced by outside forces, I hope you get the support you need & deserve, I hope you & your baby have a safe, normal birth, & I'm sending you all of the good vibes & best wishes in the world. Soon, you'll have your baby in your arms. Many blessings, -Lauren, hba2c mama