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Having A Boy but scared of no pain med...........

Last post 02-20-2010 9:11 PM by SLVA. 9 replies.
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  • 07-31-2009 7:48 PM

    Having A Boy but scared of no pain med...........

    I am so scared because I am having a baby boy but I want to have a natural child birth but i heard that i would be dumb for doing it. I feel that when you have your first kid you should experence everything because it's a wonderful experence to go through.
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  • 08-01-2009 7:38 AM In reply to

    • ~Sonia~
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 09-19-2006
    • Posts 155

    Re: Having A Boy but scared of no pain med...........

    I have had three babies, all med-free, vaginal births.  The experience is like no other...yes, it's painful, but the pain of childbirth is different than other pain.  I serves a purpose, it is NOT constant, and there IS an end to it.  I believe in educating yourself as much as you can about the natural birth process, taking childbirth education classes, and MOST IMPORTANTLY hiring a doula.  Those were the things that helped me get through it .... my doula was instrumental in helping me achieve my birth goals (and she's the reason I became a doula!). 

     Your body was MADE to do this...don't lose sight of that no matter what anyone tries to tell you!  :)

    Have a beautiful birth!!

  • 08-01-2009 9:27 AM In reply to

    • hcjfctc
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 01-24-2008
    • Keira Joy born 10/19/2009~Virginia Beach, VA
    • Posts 58

    Re: Having A Boy but scared of no pain med...........

    Yes, definitely prepare. Don't go into the hospital saying you want a natural birh, but not preparing for it or your likely to not have the birth you were hoping for. So a solid birth plan, assertive coach or doula, and lots of education and preperation are the keys.
  • 08-01-2009 3:11 PM In reply to

    Re: Having A Boy but scared of no pain med...........

    PLEASE don't be scared. NOTHING willl wreck a natural birth quicker than fear. One great way to put those fears to rest is to do LOTS of reading and research between now and the birth. I can recommend some great books if u'r interested. And don't listen to those stupid people who try to discourage you. Unfortunately, it goes with the territory when u decide to go natural. It's very hard to find support. Stay connected with natural birth boards/forums. They'll support you and you'll gain lots of advice and information.
  • 08-31-2009 11:41 AM In reply to

    Re: Having A Boy but scared of no pain med...........

    After my OB crossed his arms and informed me that I would change my mind about: early induction, epidural and episiotomy, and had no useful reading materials for helping me prepare for birth, I decided to have a natural birth with a midwife at home when I was 30. The day before Hezekai was due labor started. My mom walked me around the block a few times then after a nap my labor advanced dramatically. The contractions became distracting and I didn't want to lay down or walk much anymore, so I got into the tub. That's when I melted into labor. The pain of contractions was reduced dramatically, it still hurt, but I could relax into it all and we could laugh (especially when I asked for some Tylenol) and converse again. We set up a kiddie pool on the back porch and I would alternate between the tub and pool every hour so my labor wouldn't stall and I could use the potty. When I had to lay down to check dialation the pain was excruciating, now I feel bad for any woman who has to labor in a bed, even hanging from my Mom's shoulders (hubby was too tall) was better than that. I labored a total of 21 hours, and delivered on my knees gripping the headboard, my son was beautiful, my man was right by my side and my Mom and midwife were wonderful too. I am 34 now and expecting my second son next month, another home birth, the "pain" won't scare me off, the EFFORT of labor and delivery are something to prepare for with research, exercise and finding peace in yourself.
  • 10-28-2009 12:35 PM In reply to

    Re: Having A Boy but scared of no pain med...........

    I am in the same boat this time. I'm preparing for a natural birth this time around. My birth with my son was highly medicated. That experience was so difficult and painful that in a weird way I feel like natural childbirth will be easier-because I will be in control- If that makes any sense at all. The experience of all those med's and being confined to a hospital bed scares me more the second time around-and I would take movement and better support over that any day. Hope this helps.
  • 12-11-2009 8:17 PM In reply to

    • Mandee_Kae
    • Top 500 Contributor
    • Joined on 10-07-2007
    • Just taking up space...
    • Posts 1,101

    Re: Having A Boy but scared of no pain med...........

    We took Bradly Classes while pregnant with my son, but my DH sort of lost focus, and I had to be induced because of low fluids...so...I toughed it out while on pitocin until I was afraid that I'd be too tired to push and finally caved and took the epi.  I was really progressing nicely until I took the epi and then I pretty much stalled and they started talking about a c-sect (which was the whole reason I took the stupid epi...trying to avoid the c!) but I finally finished dilating and pushed him out.  I'm hoping to be stronger and better prepared this time.  Knowledge is power... I know a little better what to expect and I've had a nice talk with my DH and explained to him exactly what needs to happen.  I think a doula (if we could afford one) would be great...and if not, then make sure you have a very assertive and informed coach who is going to stick with you and your plan.  Good luck!

  • 01-14-2010 5:36 PM In reply to

    Re: Having A Boy but scared of no pain med...........

    I recommend "The Doula Book" to learn all about what they do. If you can't afford one you may still be able to find tips to help you be calm and in control during labor so that you can let your body do what is was meant to do. When you feel scared just remember all the women that have given birth in the past without any meds, knowledge or support. In the meantime try practising some creative visualization to keep your mind focused away from the pain. And just keep thinking that every contraction is one step closer to seeing your baby boy. Lots of luck!
  • 02-05-2010 9:25 AM In reply to

    Re: Having A Boy but scared of no pain med...........

    I am with everybody here, hire a caring supprotive doula!!!! the statistics dont lie!
  • 02-20-2010 9:11 PM In reply to

    • SLVA
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 03-16-2008
    • Grand Rapids, MI - Maia 08/14/08, EDD 6/12/10
    • Posts 308

    Re: Having A Boy but scared of no pain med...........

    Just to give another perspective... it can be done without a doula, but you'll benefit from preparing yourself in other ways.  We don't all have the same resources or options: no finances for a doula, no birthing centers in your area, and there are some not-so-good midwives out there too, and there are some excellent OBs who will be supportive of a med-free birth.  I managed to have a great pain-med free, vaginal birth in a hospital with an OB.  But I went into it thinking: Knowledge is power, and I need to think of this like training for a marathon. Yes, it's only one day, but who would just go run a 25k without preparing mind and body!?!  And we started talking to the OB early, and kept talking throughout my pregnancy as we learned more good questions to ask.

    Start your research, talk to your OB or midwife about their philosophy on interventions and if you're not comfortable with the answer, look for someone who matches your goals.  Also ask about how things are handled by the staff where you will deliver: you'll spend a LOT more time with your L&D nurse than your OB!  If your healthcare provider is on board, but most of your care will be handled by residents (who are young, nervous and inexperienced, and might be more likely to make reactionary decisions), then build an exclusion into your birth plan that residents/students are not allowed to be involved in decision making in your care, and make sure your provider agrees.

    And don't forget that your partner/coach needs to be educated, too!  Lamaze classes, Bradley Method... whatever works with your personalities. Some insurance companies even cover Lamaze classes (mine didn't cover Bradley, but either might be covered under "flex spending" if you have it!).  Anyone who is going to be in the room needs to be knowledgable and actively supporting you, advocating for you, anticipating your needs, and coaching you through your marathon.

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