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Miscarriage Support

It’s perfectly normal to feel shock, grief, depression, fatigue, and a sense of failure after a miscarriage – especially if it was your first or if you had a hard time conceiving. But the women on this board know just what you’re going through and can offer support, help, and friendship.
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Could he be wrong?

Last post 11-03-2009 12:45 PM by missjessie101. 8 replies.
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  • 10-26-2009 4:52 PM

    • fab-mom
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 06-09-2006
    • Hazel Green, AL *Mommy to Tallulah & 1 angel baby*
    • Posts 248

    Could he be wrong?

    Last week, on Tuesday,  my doctor informed me that our baby was not developing and there was no heartbeat. I would have been 8 weeks on Friday. I was home for 3 days grieving and coming to terms with the loss of our baby after all the trouble we had TTC and conceiving on our own even though all the fertility tests said we never would.  A week ago today they tested my levels (54,000). \My doctor said on Tuesday after the ultrasound that it was more than likely just left over...Today I am feeling so pregnant still. Just exhausted around  the same time of day as always and quesiness too. I took a left over test I had tonight and a line appeared seriously before it seemed I put the 3rd drop on the strip. So as far as hormones I am still VERY much pregnant. I have had no spotting or cramps or anything. I just don't get it. I don't want to give myself false hope but I don't want to give up too soon either. Has anyone ever dealt with this? I am suppose to go back in tomoorw for another ultrasound "just to be sure" is how the doctor put it. But he went ahead and gave me my rhogam shot last week which tells me he was pretty darn sure then...I'm just so frustrated. This has been going on since the ultrasound at 4 weeks. :( So a month now I have been dealing with this.....I know it sounds totally awful but if this baby is really gone then I just want to be done with it and start rebuilding my life. I feel awful for even saying that but this roller coaster ride is horrible and I don't know if I can take much more of it.

     

    Oh the doctor also said that he would not perform a D&C in this situation...not yet anyways. Like I said...I feel like I am just grasping at any possibility that my baby is still alive..but I also think anyone would.....I am just so confused and overwhelmed by the whole situation and any help or information would be appreciated.

  • 10-26-2009 5:47 PM In reply to

    I do not want to offer false hope but doctors do misdiagnose miscarriages, If I were you I would request they recheck my levels and/or do another ultrasound

    here is a link to a site you may find interesting. http://www.misdiagnosedmiscarriage.com/mycommunity/viewtopic.php?p=88633

    if your uterus is tilted or you did not ovulate exactly when you thought your doctor could be wrong..

    either way my heart goes out to you and I wish you the very best of luck. wanting to go on with life if you did indeed miscarry is perfectly normal.
  • 10-27-2009 7:35 AM In reply to

    • fab-mom
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 06-09-2006
    • Hazel Green, AL *Mommy to Tallulah & 1 angel baby*
    • Posts 248

    Re: Could he be wrong?

     Thank you so much for that website. At the very least it is good to hear similar stories.

  • 10-28-2009 8:25 PM In reply to

    • olsonbr
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 05-19-2005
    • Lily 10/3/06, Gaby 8/9/08, ^5^
    • Posts 56

    Re: Could he be wrong?

    I'm sorry to hear you are going through this. I have not been fortunate enough to find the doctor to be wrong. In the past 4 years, I've had 7 pregnancies (2m/c, 1 daughter, 2m/c, 1 daughter, and my last m/c 3 weeks ago). My most recent m/c... appeared to be developing fine with good numbers. I was taking progesterone suppositories for the first time with this pregnancy which made me feel much stronger pregnancy symptoms so I couldn't go by symptoms to reassure myself of anything. At 9w2d, I had an ultrasound (of many) which showed the baby measured 9w4d but no longer had the heartbeat we had seen before. We scheduled a follow up for a week. It seemed like a long time but I hoped that maybe they were wrong. The longer I could push off that follow up, the better because to me, I was still pregnant. Unfortunately, the Dr was right and the baby still didn't have a heartbeat. I was given a choice and I chose to have a D&C a couple of days later. I did not take a pregnancy test nor have blood levels drawn at the end so I don't know if they still showed I was pregnant. Once it was definite that the pregnancy was over, I just wanted it to be over. I wanted to begin to heal and try again. My first pregnancy also ended in a D&C. At that time, I was 12w3d and my symptoms had subsided which I thought was normal. I was not on any meds other than a prenatal vitamin. The baby was measuring 9w3d and no heartbeat. The Dr I had at that time told me that if I had taken a pregnancy test, it would be negative. I didn't check. All of my other m/c were natural. All different. All before 6.5 weeks. I've had positive turned negative HPTs before bleeding started and I've had it where I had heavy bleeding for days with a lingering positive HPT. Although it hasn't happened to me, I have heard of miscarriages being misdiagnosed. I wish you luck and you'll be in my thoughts.
  • 11-02-2009 12:27 PM In reply to

    • Mizzstartzman7709
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 11-11-2008
    • ~GA~ Mommy to Alyssa~one angel baby~TTC #2
    • Posts 106

    Re: Could he be wrong?

     I remember you from TTC to the June board, and my heart sank when I read about what happened. I followed with a m/c myself. Sometimes drs are wrong, and that can happen. Follow your heart and gut instincts! Hugs!!

  • 11-02-2009 2:30 PM In reply to

    • fab-mom
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 06-09-2006
    • Hazel Green, AL *Mommy to Tallulah & 1 angel baby*
    • Posts 248

    Re: Could he be wrong?

     Well...I'm still waiting. Still no signs of miscarriage. He did call in some pills to help soften the cervix but I was already sick with some virus this weekend so I couldn't even bring myself to take them...the last thing I wanted was to feel worse! So here I am at 9 weeks 3 days and still feeling very pregnant and just waiting. Which my levels were still pretty high last Monday so that is understandable. It's going to take awhile for them to drop.I am scheduled to go back in on the 17th unless something happens before then. I really don't have much hope anymore...but I still can't do it. I can't take the pills. I'm scared. So, I will wait.

  • 11-02-2009 2:47 PM In reply to

    • Mizzstartzman7709
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 11-11-2008
    • ~GA~ Mommy to Alyssa~one angel baby~TTC #2
    • Posts 106

    Re: Could he be wrong?

    Jenny read this story it's so inspirational from a lady on my birth board.

    http://shopwithmemama.com/blog/entry...-taken-from-me

    I understand that you don't want to take the medicine....I do not undestand this at all. I still have all my pg symptoms too even with the hcg level being so low I am here with you and you are in my thoughts! Hugs!

  • 11-03-2009 11:20 AM In reply to

    Re: Could he be wrong?

    oh my god, i read that story [[ posted by momma above me ]] && i cried & cried. that is the most amazing thing i've ever read. i have had to miscarriages, one that this story made me think what if about.. i also have a friend who is having her dnc right this moment & i feel so badly for her this story just really hit home! i agree with the mother, i think there should alwas be one last u/s before anything further is done. that was an amazing story!
  • 11-03-2009 12:45 PM In reply to

    Re: Could he be wrong?

    I loved that story. I had a simular experience. I stated bleeding at what would have been 4 or 5 weeks. Went to the ER had an ultrasound and was told nothing was there not even fluid. I was sent home and told I was never really pregnant ( they never waited for labs at this point) The Dr said I was having a really heavy period and that no surgery was needed since I was never pregnant. Well just a few weeks later I woke up in the worst pain ever and demaned my hubby take me to the ER or I would call an ambulance. He took me, and by the time I got there I was soaked in sweat and sheet white and shaking. They rushed me back and ordered an ultrasound and labs. I was shaking so much that they could not get a clear U/S but finally opted to give me some pain meds. (at this point they thought maby a tubal and were prepaired to go to surgery) -- When I was finally still enough to do the U/S they told me did you know you were 8 weeks pregnant. Well since that last dr told me no I was not I was shocked. They pulled up my old records and the nurse told me Yes you were pregnant and the numbers don't lie. No one had ever contacted me to update me on my labs! I ended up having kidney stones and they kept me and pretty much flushed my system to rid me of the stones. As of this time the baby was perfectly fine. A few weeks later when I was at my OB they did the AFP test and once again I was told there was a problem. It was 3 times higher than it sould have been. Now that can mean a lot of things but ultimately we figure I did miscarry but I still had a baby in there they was invisable to everyone. My Gabriel was suppose to be a twin and I am so lucky that I have him at all. My opinion is that ER's don't take the time to really look -- If I had a good U/S tech they would have seen my little boy in there. And if the Dr would have acted like he cared at all (he was a huge ***!) maby we could have figured this out sooner. Good Luck -- I wish you the best, and always follow your heart!
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