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Very unexpected, very bad time :(

Last post 09-18-2009 6:38 PM by julesnac. 4 replies.
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  • 07-28-2009 10:34 PM

    Very unexpected, very bad time :(

    So I thought I had the stomach flu recently, but turns out I'm pregnant (~7 weeks)! A huge shock. I'm 22 (single, but with an amazing long-term boyfriend whose pretty much my husband) I am a pre-med student, I'll be in medical school in ~2 years. It sounded like a very bad time, especially since my boyfriend recently lost his job (what a wonderful economy...). However, I went in for an ultrasound today and they asked me if I wanted to see the pictures; being a future doctor, of course I did! Turns out I'm pregnant with twins, and for some reason that really got to me. The whole day I've been a complete mess. I can't imagine giving up this pregnancy, but at the same time I feel it could ruin my career as a doctor (I've heard having a child is a full time job...). I'll be seeing my therapist soon too, hope that will help. Any help from women out there with career vs. baby issues? How long did it take you to get back on track? This is such a huge (aka emotional!) decision!!
  • 07-31-2009 9:11 PM In reply to

    • shell0486
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 07-24-2009
    • Fort Wayne Indiana
    • Posts 110

    Re: Very unexpected, very bad time :(

    I think that with the help of a supporting partner and family you will have no problems. Things seem to work thenselves out in time!! Good Luck!
  • 08-06-2009 10:04 AM In reply to

    • snapmama
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 08-05-2009
    • Hartford, CT area
    • Posts 82

    Re: Very unexpected, very bad time :(

    hey there ice hockey,

    i am unexpectedly pregnant as well. but i really feel for your situation. I wanted to encourage you though. My ex husband is a doctor and we married when he was in med school. anyway we knew several med students who were moms and dads during school. they did fine. they had to manage their time differently, but they all did well, passed their classes, went on to residencies and such.... talk to your family, see about assistance (one friend was on WIC) and you can make it. It'll be ok!

  • 09-11-2009 3:01 PM In reply to

    Re: Very unexpected, very bad time :(

    I am much older than you, but can say as a women who was pre-med herself, I understand the stress and demands on you during school. Medical school is worse (I didn't go, but many friends did). However, I have a very demanding career and was so worried when I became pregnant. How was I going to handle having a baby and a career? None of my friends work. Well, I am on number 3 and I can tell you it is not that hard. What is important is that you have family or a support network to help you take care of the baby. If your boyfriend is supportive and willing to help and you have a mom, sister or someone that will be there for those cramming sessions, then you are in good shape. My 3rd pregnancy was unexpected and I also had twins ( lost one). I was very upset. My husband of 11 years was against having another child. He is still very mad at me. However, when I saw those 2 little heartbeats on the ultrasound, I couldn't "take care of it" if you know what I mean. I'm now 16 weeks pregnant and happy with my choice to keep the baby. Even though I lost one, I know I made the right choice. My husband also is not working and our finances are a mess, but in my opinion, this is a blessing. Interestingly, I also have a friend who is a twin and ironically, his parents were both in medical school when they found out his mom was pregnant. Both parents made it through medical school, are doctors, and have two awesome twin boys, now age 23. So, It is your choice, but I think you can make it.
  • 09-18-2009 6:38 PM In reply to

    • julesnac
    • Not Ranked
    • Joined on 05-06-2009
    • Michigan
    • Posts 198

    Re: Very unexpected, very bad time :(

    i am sure you would make it with a supportive partner & family. none of my pregnancies were ever planned. i worked full time & attended school part time with my first two children- granted i wasn't pre-med, i was going for paralegal so i'm sure not as demanding. but it was a lot of work. but my DH at the time was very supportive & helped out a lot. i don't think you have to chose career vs family, it's just a different way of balancing your time.

    i am now unexpectedly pregnant with #3 and was just divorced from DH / father of my first 2 children and have been laid off from my job as well. i guess my point... no matter when it happens, expected or not, there are always going to be some circumstances to deal with, some obstacles to get around... but what determines if you can 'make it' is your attitude and your network of support! good luck :)

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